Monday, June 8, 2009 @ 12:37:00 AM
$BlogItemTitle$>
Just random thoughts today.
I've always wanted to do nursing. (No, not that Ive dropped out of it.) But I've always wanted to have it done in either Nanyang or Ngee Ann Polytechnic right after my Os. But results was a disappointment. Not that I didnt expect it, but I know I could have done way better and get where I wanted to. I got very upset about my results I was on the verge of giving up. But I didnt just yet. I found out there was nursing in ITE. So I gathered all my strength back and with much confidence, I applied for it. I got shortlisted shortly after, went for the interview, and I got it! God knows how much of a contented gleeful bitch I was that day.
So, I thought, "It's ITE. I will sail through this 2 years." Literally sail through. But that was indeed much of what I assumed. I had to adapt to hell. It was like I was in the middle of the sea, almost drowning, struggling to get to shore. I've never expected it to be this tough. Not only me, I bet the whole cohort of nursing students out there too. From basic discipline, to studies, to attachments, it all needed to be somewhat close to perfect.
We were all reminded from the start & time and again, we had to be prepared to be deprived of all things precious in our life. Everything from personal to public, social to private. And true enough, first, I lost friends. Not literally lost, but I find myself drifting apart. I got left behind of the latest happenings in my friends' lives. I didn't even have a time of my own anymore. What more family? I found myself trying to make time for the family. No more of the weekly heart-to-heart talks with mum, I was trying harder to start a conversation with dad, and I only get to tease/argue with the siblings in the wee hours of the morning before I leave for school or when I get home which is superduper late. And doing all of that feeling almost dead. I wasn't quite myself anymore. Time spent with the other half got more limited with each passing week. But with sacrifices here and there, we still managed. We still held on. Alhamdulillah.
In school. I got caught countless times for my hair. I had to dye my hair black over and over again & get my fringe pinned up just to shut the lecturers' gaps. Hah. Having to get to school by 7.45am everyday and ending at the earliest, 5pm, was a dread. Habitual latecoming/one and a half day of absentism without valid reason, there you go- POTENTIAL DEBARMENT LIST. Only 3MCs & 2parent letters will be accepted. Other than that, you'd have to start drafting an appeal letter. I got debarred once in 1.1. For? 8days of absentism due to road traffic accident. Ridiculous? Very. I was hospitalised, nothing much I can do, so I had to come up with an appeal letter, with proof documents. And of course, they had to accept my appeal la! If they don't then it's utterly bullshit ah. 1.2 went fine. And now Im in 2.1. I was in the debarment list, again. And still, my luck. Appealed, accepted.
Academically. I tell you, it is NOT easy. I had to talk, eat, & sleep nursing almost all the time! Mum saw a different side, a side she was shocked to see. A mugger in me. But Im happy, Im satisfied, because all those hardwork didn't go to waste. It's all paying off. Though I dont get distinctions all the time, I managed atleast a B at my worst. And well, needless to say, I am proud of myself and I know I can do better. Above all, I've always had this thing for nursing. So, never mind the mental, physical & emotional torture now, I'll be the one with the benefits in the end. (:
Haiya, thats about it actually. I don't know why Im even blogging. Killing boredom, perhaps?